Thursday Blog 3.01.13

It’s a very unpleasant topic for me, but sometimes we have to talk about things we detest most I believe. Often to ease our own conscience that we did our bit!

After a monstrous gang-rape on a young woman in Delhi, our capital which resulted ultimately in her death the media is picking up every news of rapes and highlighting them, suddenly making us aware how many women suffer from this plight every day. It’s horrible to think about that!

Now, I don’t think any woman provokes or invites these accidents like one too many people…people who should have thought twice before saying such things because their words are accepted as reflection of society’s opinion. I believe they were just unlucky. I have done really dumb things and have been spared. My fortress crumbled from inside attack but that’s not the thing I want to talk about. I have already shared that story in “Honey Trap”.

I have been reading a little about the preventive measures offered to young girls and career women or women who live a single life and have collected a few notes.

This day onwards, let’s never ever think that a woman invited or deserved such a heinous act- even if she is a sex worker (some people think sex workers can be raped). If you ever come to know about someone you know has faced this horrible trauma for the sake of human being inside you treat her with kindness and sympathy. Even if you have something inside you don’t speak it out unless of course you think that it’s a fake allegation. We women especially make the life of rape victims a perfect hell. As women we should be feeling pity, sympathy for them but mostly we spend our time in researching why was she raped and ponder whether or not she provoked the animal inside the man/men.

The scenario in conservative countries like India is really different from countries like USA or UK. Here the rapists mostly return to mainstream instantly or after a while but the rape victim is labeled for the remaining life and her life is a truly miserable one. Hundred mouths remind her of her misfortune constantly. They just don’t let her forget.

These incidents are so much in rise that Indians need to change their mindset, they should start treating the rape victims with the love, and tenderness they deserve and help them into forgetting that monstrosity.

A society that does not allows mixing of girls and boys, does not gives students sex education but the world outside is filled with porn and blue movies and human trafficking can’t avoid this horrible fate. These movies provoke young minds and they find out their own ways.

On the other hand the vultures attached with human trafficking are always prowling around, degrading the status of women, making them vulnerable and trying to buy every woman they come across or kidnap, lure, misguide them resulting in a confused society that brands every woman who is dressed up to boots as sex worker or any woman who is living a free life available for money.

When the offer does not works out it results in ugly incidents and if the woman is good looking or attractive she may face more problems. So, in place of blaming women start thinking why are these incidents rising in such a scary speed or it’s something else- it was like this always only in past the victims committed suicide and these days they protest.

I myself think some things are quite responsible for these atrocities- one, after so many centuries of living as slaves, second class citizen women have finally become free and that has resulted in anger and frustration in minds of quite a good percentage of men and they try to punish these women.

Next is, rampant availability of provocative materials and no scope of satisfying that provoked mind. They can go to sex workers but what if they don’t have money or don’t want to spend it?

Three is if a country lets human trafficking run so rampantly in it I don’t think it respects its women or gives a hoot to their dignity. If human trafficking is so rampant then the country is filled with its touts and pimps and of course their victims and workers- so how can that country be safe for women? or how can women dream of being treated nicely in that country?

These are my personal opinion. But I will request Indian women to open their eyes and smell the coffee and accept the reality and after that brave themselves to face it! days of demure, shy girls are gone forever! It’s the era of street smart, perceptive girls who have the capacity of delivering some kicks and punches if the situation needs.




    1. its quite intriguing to observe that people look for slip in the “victim”s behaviour but ignore the sharp fall in the offender’s behaviour.

      you have stopped the “comment” option in your blog, right?

  1. You have a prettier view of what goes on in the USA than what is reality.Rape victims here often do not report the rapes.They are usually interrogated more than the offender.It is especially true when the victim knows her rapist. People will not take her word for it.Even parents usually do not believe the victim. Lawyers get rapists off on technicalities, even when they ARE arrested, or they get them acquitted. The victim has to face the public stigma of making a ‘false’ accusation, or , even if they believe there was a sex act involved, they treat her as a tramp.; no difference from there. The woman loses her social standing and her reputation is ruined, plus, she is labeled as a liar. Doctors get away with molesting patients, (as do family members); the AMA and other doctors protect them.There are always family members who rally around rapists and protect them, hide evidence, give false witness or pay to get them released from prison. I understand that in India many situations are very bad, especially for women;I have Indian doctors, I have a good friend in the US who is from Calcutta,my neighbor across the street is from Porbandar.I have a friend who emails, messages and calls who is in Mumbai,(the family is from Kerala). But believe me, rape is an international crime against women and children and I am not sure the victims are taken seriously anywhere in the world.

    1. thats painful! i used to think that the rape victims are treated better in western countries, but at the end, there is one hope for them, they may get a sympathetic, good spouse in future, in india chances of that are zero! even if you were a child when you were raped! usually parents hush up and lie or give away their daughters to really, really unworthy grooms that in turn is another hell for them.

      1. Most stay silent here, my dear. Men will throw it up in the woman’s face when they are angry even years later, even if they say they will be sympathetic in the beginning.(Men will often make many promises to get a woman. Many men never know that their wives were abused , molested or raped as children. Many men would avoid those women here, trust me. People are people all over the world. And the worst part is, the immorality in the US now.So many marry and divorce and remarry,sometimes several times.Many do not bother to marry at all but cohabit openly and change partners often. It is usually accepted, because there isn’t much choice, since it is so common. You might be glad that there is some semblance of morality there.

      2. sad to know that! really sad! well, may be its time now that women will remind men that they can do without them, happily, i for my part dont miss a lover/spouse in my life, am living quite happily, even though every one has been warning me since my youth “you will regret!” 🙂


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